Supreme Court Haiku

These verses, written in October 2014, were inspired by mentions of other Supreme Court haiku in an article Andy Schwartzman sent me from the Washington Post.

I love the haikus.
Many thanks for sending this
Piece of trivia.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Is angry all the time now,
As well she should be.

Justice Kennedy
Likes to be the prized swing vote.
It’s all about him.

So what is Thomas
Thinking about on the bench?
He’s writing haikus.

Where’s Justice Marshall
When we need him, which is now?
Either one of them.

Barry should appoint
Linda Greenhouse to the Court.
Then things would happen!

It’s easy to begin
Writing haikus, but it is
Difficult to stop.

Stephen G. Breyer
Never puts a footnote in
Any opinion.

Scalia believes
Everything is in the text.
Thomas thinks so too.

No Protestants left.
Only Catholics and Jews.
Jews lose, 6-3.

Certiorari
Improvidently granted.
Go jump in the lake.

Ginsburg’s from Brooklyn,
Sotomayor’s from the Bronx,
Kagan: the West Side.

Scalia’s from Queens.
Staten Island’s out of luck.
No one comes from there.

Constitution says:
Prosecution’s always good,
Regulation’s bad.

Voting is sacred
If the votes are for our side.
[George W. Bush].

Corporations can
Shovel cash into the system;
No one can stop them.

Right above the door:
EQUAL JUSTICE UNDER LAW.
But they don’t mean it.

Haikus shouldn’t snarl.
I am getting bitter here.
Peonies! Birdsong!

Justice Alito.
Reactionary weasel,
His eyes full of guilt.

Chief Justice Roberts
Ponders how to help his side
Without looking bad.

O three weird sisters –
Fair is foul and foul is fair!
Help us through this patch.

Remember back then,
Karen Black, Melvyn Douglas?
Giants in those days.

Who do we have now?
The smallest justice of all
May be a giant.

Five, seven and five.
I should take a sleeping pill
Or I’ll never stop.